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iheartmuseic :
This is actually not a status. It was a post a girl made in the facebook group for the uni I'm attending next year. But I felt like it needed to be shared because I choked on my water as a result of reading it.
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Hello Fordham University Class of 2015!!!, For all incoming male virgins I will be offering my services the first month of school please provide the following
Age:
Weight:
Height:
Circumcised(Y/N):
Length:
Black?:
Also to save time and sessions I will do DP and or Gangbangs. Pay will be discussed at a later time. Thank You 
Link?
A Liver A Lung A Kidney A Thumb
last.fm
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Quote
iheartmuseic :
This is actually not a status. It was a post a girl made in the facebook group for the uni I'm attending next year. But I felt like it needed to be shared because I choked on my water as a result of reading it.
Quote
Hello Fordham University Class of 2015!!!, For all incoming male virgins I will be offering my services the first month of school please provide the following
Age:
Weight:
Height:
Circumcised(Y/N):
Length:
Black?:
Also to save time and sessions I will do DP and or Gangbangs. Pay will be discussed at a later time. Thank You
Good golly gosh
Sheffield Arena - 04/11/09
Wembley Stadium - 11/09/10
REAL FAN
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Oceansizer :
Quote
iheartmuseic :
This is actually not a status. It was a post a girl made in the facebook group for the uni I'm attending next year. But I felt like it needed to be shared because I choked on my water as a result of reading it.
Quote
Hello Fordham University Class of 2015!!!, For all incoming male virgins I will be offering my services the first month of school please provide the following
Age:
Weight:
Height:
Circumcised(Y/N):
Length:
Black?:
Also to save time and sessions I will do DP and or Gangbangs. Pay will be discussed at a later time. Thank You
Link?
2 posts above yours 
13/11/09
11/09/10
last.fm
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Oh yeah! No stepdads getting in the way this time!
A Liver A Lung A Kidney A Thumb
last.fm
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The wall for that university group is classic Facebook reading material 
Sheffield Arena - 04/11/09
Wembley Stadium - 11/09/10
REAL FAN
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I flicked through and just saw a load of topless guys. That pig picture was funny though.
A Liver A Lung A Kidney A Thumb
last.fm
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I think some of the banter/arguments between the future students are hilarious... Check out some of the comments on one of those topless pics.
Sheffield Arena - 04/11/09
Wembley Stadium - 11/09/10
REAL FAN
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Does this count?
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"iKarmasutra"... There really is an app for everything!
This is the HTC guy from the vent thread.
The Bob Loblaw Law Blog
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"Dnt ya jst h8t whn sme bitch spreeds shit bout ya n also bout my sis .its my life nt yrs i knw wat is true n wat is nt soo fuk of laura I n thanxs my hayley (my bro gf 4 having a gan at her 4 me x"
"Y I am stoping my self frm having a gd tme y do I still feel lyk this its bout tme 4 me 2 put all memories in a box n nt open it"
Her posts are fun to try to read aloud.
Sheffield Arena 04/11/09 LCCG 04/09/10 Leeds Festival 26/08/11 Manchester Arena 01/11/2012
Etihad Arena 01/06/2013
I AM PERFECTLY CALM AND EVERYTHING IS FINE
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HeatherB33 :
"Dnt ya jst h8t whn sme bitch spreeds shit bout ya n also bout my sis .its my life nt yrs i knw wat is true n wat is nt soo fuk of laura I n thanxs my hayley (my bro gf 4 having a gan at her 4 me x"
"Y I am stoping my self frm having a gd tme y do I still feel lyk this its bout tme 4 me 2 put all memories in a box n nt open it"
Her posts are fun to try to read aloud.
I can not understand that at all. 
Do, dooo, dododo
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HeatherB33 :
"Dnt ya jst h8t whn sme bitch spreeds shit bout ya n also bout my sis .its my life nt yrs i knw wat is true n wat is nt soo fuk of laura I n thanxs my hayley (my bro gf 4 having a gan at her 4 me x"
"Y I am stoping my self frm having a gd tme y do I still feel lyk this its bout tme 4 me 2 put all memories in a box n nt open it"
Her posts are fun to try to read aloud.
Ugh...why do people have to spell like that!? So stupid. 
Wembley Stadium 16.6.07
Liverpool Echo Arena 5.11.09
Glasgow SECC 09.11.09
Manchester LCCG 04.09.10
Wembley Stadium 10/11.09.10
Leeds Festival 2011
M.E.N Arena 1.11.12
Ricoh Arena 22.5.13
Emirates Stadium 25/26.5.13
Etihad Stadium 1.6.13
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I like how most of the simple, monosyllable words are abbreviated or spelled wrong, but she managed 'memories' without much trouble.
Sheffield Arena 04/11/09 LCCG 04/09/10 Leeds Festival 26/08/11 Manchester Arena 01/11/2012
Etihad Arena 01/06/2013
I AM PERFECTLY CALM AND EVERYTHING IS FINE
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Vowels are obsolete to morons.
A Liver A Lung A Kidney A Thumb
last.fm
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I cringe at the slightest bit of internet spelling and leet speak. That just almost made me cry.
Tumblr|Twitter|Last.fm
The river is moving.
The blackbird must be flying.
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HeatherB33 :
I like how most of the simple, monosyllable words are abbreviated or spelled wrong, but she managed 'memories' without much trouble.
13/11/09
11/09/10
last.fm
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Another gem:
"I hope I get 2 see sme1 2moz n whn I do i wnt a hug I hope u knw who u r xxxxxx I think only my sis knws who it is 2 haha"
Edit: A boy posted this on her wall:
"Fuck it if u can't be bothered to reply when I am trying so hard to make u happy even though u know I wouldn't hurt u in a million years u still wont go out with me then fuck it y do I even bother trying coz I am so nice to u and sometimes u just throw it back in my face u could at least tell my y u don't want to go out rather than just ignoring me"
Not the same comedy spelling, but gotta love facebook beef.
Sheffield Arena 04/11/09 LCCG 04/09/10 Leeds Festival 26/08/11 Manchester Arena 01/11/2012
Etihad Arena 01/06/2013
I AM PERFECTLY CALM AND EVERYTHING IS FINE
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Poor guy. He just wanted a date 
...And then I said; Oatmeal, are you CRAZY?!
Last.fm
Bass covers!
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I kinda feel sorry for the guy, even if he does have shit taste in women.
13/11/09
11/09/10
last.fm
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Man, this thread has provided me with so many lol's already.
I have to post this one. It's an absolute belter.
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^ LOL
Earls Court London 20.12.04
Manchester Arena MEN 10.11.06
Echo Arena Liverpool 05.11.09
LCCC Manchester 04.09.10
Manchester Arena MEN 01.11.12
Emirates Stadium London 25&26.05.13
Etihad Stadium Manchester 01.06.13
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Oh wow .
EDIT:
Retard
even though im huge hacker there was no need mesing up the ps3 system!!
Seriously? I'm almost certain you failed I.T. GCSE, the fuck are you on about hacking? Oh wait, yeah, hacking = cheat codes on a Playstation game. Cool.
Take the pieces and build them skywards.
M.E.N Arena 06 - Wembley 07 - V Fest 08 - o2 Arena 09 - Wembley 10 - Reading 11 - M.E.N Arena 12 - Shepherds Bush 13 - Emirates 13 - Emirates 13 - Horses Guard 13
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Quote
iheartmuseic :
This is actually not a status. It was a post a girl made in the facebook group for the uni I'm attending next year. But I felt like it needed to be shared because I choked on my water as a result of reading it.
Quote
Hello Fordham University Class of 2015!!!, For all incoming male virgins I will be offering my services the first month of school please provide the following
Age:
Weight:
Height:
Circumcised(Y/N):
Length:
Black?:
Also to save time and sessions I will do DP and or Gangbangs. Pay will be discussed at a later time. Thank You
Alex - if this kind of talk continues I'm going to alert your boyfriend about what will be going on once you start school.
Heather - im sick of his shit ok Alex, the only reason im with him is i have nowhere else to go, and i cant fucken find a job and might as well do something im good at
Alex - But you're with him so you should just look the other way and be faithful. How do you think he will feel when you come back home from school and a big black cock tore your vag up? He will definitely be able to tell and will not be happy. You will cause him to enter a deep stage of depression due to not being able to do what the bbc did. Don't put him in that state Heather.
Heather - lol did u not hear me, im DONE!, hes put me through enough, anyways his sex was beyond a joke
Jamaal - hahahahahaa OMG Heather this was funny as shit! whether youre playin or not..(assumin your playin lol) but fareal..i almost choked lol
Heather - not playin hun, how am i supposed to buy my books?
Some really brilliant comments :P
LOL
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jonodillieono :
Alex - if this kind of talk continues I'm going to alert your boyfriend about what will be going on once you start school.
Heather - im sick of his shit ok Alex, the only reason im with him is i have nowhere else to go, and i cant fucken find a job and might as well do something im good at
Alex - But you're with him so you should just look the other way and be faithful. How do you think he will feel when you come back home from school and a big black cock tore your vag up? He will definitely be able to tell and will not be happy. You will cause him to enter a deep stage of depression due to not being able to do what the bbc did. Don't put him in that state Heather.
Heather - lol did u not hear me, im DONE!, hes put me through enough, anyways his sex was beyond a joke
Jamaal - hahahahahaa OMG Heather this was funny as shit! whether youre playin or not..(assumin your playin lol) but fareal..i almost choked lol
Heather - not playin hun, how am i supposed to buy my books?
Some really brilliant comments :P
Ahaha. A lot of quotes in this thread tread the line between funny and tragic... this one is both. Brilliant.
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